Review
The Neptunas
Mermaid A-Go-Go

Altered State Of Reverb (2020) Christopher D

The Neptunas – Mermaid A-Go-Go cover artwork
The Neptunas – Mermaid A-Go-Go — Altered State Of Reverb, 2020



Tell ‘em Charlie sent you!? Dolphin safe Tuna-free of long lining, bottom trawling, and blood shrimp. Sustainable fishing has cast the long sea of doubt with shadows of ghost nets dancing and entangling, engulfing innocent species with its dark hand of doom claw-like grasp.

Alas ascending from Neptune’s bikini bottomless cavernous cretin encrusted trident thrust through the decrepit blackened charbroiled throbbing fatty deposits omakase broken-hearted industry of evil tainted enterprise.

Twanging like Eddy and chipping like Dale with the hunger of a manta WRAY. These sirens beckon thee out to a watery bog, encapsulating energy-draining nuances filled with Nitrate, Napalm, and numbing agents. Come with me my love to the Sea ..the sea of love.

Frolicking innocently bobbing Manowar (not to be confused with the dragon-riding codpiece wearing metal band) awaiting to brush tenderly like Dalis psychedelicized surreal brush stroke. Stinging venom-filled nematocysts writhing in Ventures of affliction. Death Rattle buzz gasping water-filled pneumonic plague. Catching a ride under the waves of endless summer and french fry stealing squawking dank dive bomb kamikaze seagulls. Jubblified jabberwocky clutching nuclear melting cryogenic cones screaming for one last ride upon vomit-inducing carny folk assembled bolt throwers. Greta groaning hoary evil Teletubbie sun rays blasting popping fluid-filled pus sacks encrusting carcinogen-filled nose cream further into busted cartilage. Refractory hammerheads mammocking single droplets of nostril fuel sending vaticinating vampires into false negative waves. Remember kids nothing smaller than an elbow must be inserted into the breathe holes and be true to your school even though most don't have a physical one these days.

Live for the Sun, Sun, Sun, Son...using Brian Wilson’s bed springs to rebound back into life as the ocean air fills your pores with heat, beer, and waves of lore.

J'apprécie la musique de surf même lorsque je suis amené à ériger des mamelons à des températures inférieures à zéro.

The Neptunas – Mermaid A-Go-Go cover artwork
The Neptunas – Mermaid A-Go-Go — Altered State Of Reverb, 2020

Recently-posted album reviews

Nine Pound Hammer

Too Outlaw For Outlaw Country
Reptilian Records (2026)

For nearly forty years, Nine Pound Hammer have occupied a strange corner of American music that very few bands have ever managed to touch. They're too loud for traditional country, too country for most punk bands, too dirty for radio rock, and frankly too stubborn to care where anyone thinks they belong. That's exactly why Too Outlaw For Outlaw Country … Read more

Fuming Mouth

The Ringing Bell”
Triple B (2026)

There are plenty of bands capable of writing crushing death metal. There are plenty of bands capable of writing punishing hardcore. Very few can occupy both worlds without sounding like they're simply alternating between genres. Fuming Mouth have spent years refining that balance, and The Ringing Bell feels like the moment where every piece of their identity locks together. Anyone … Read more

Time Thieves

Come Home/If You Survive Extended Edition
Independent (2026)

Time Thieves, of Chicago, IL, bill themselves as power pop in the vein of The Rentals or Fountains of Wayn or Weezer in their bio and they double down on that with the smooth as silk, uplifting melody of "Cover Your Eyes," the first song on their Come Home/If You Survive Extended Edition LP that arrived on my doorstep, literally … Read more