Review
Celebrity Murders
Time to Kill Space

Chainsaw Safety (2006) Kevin Fitzpatrick

Celebrity Murders – Time to Kill Space cover artwork
Celebrity Murders – Time to Kill Space — Chainsaw Safety, 2006

There are a few music "fans" that may be in denial, but I think most schooled individuals can attest that there is a tremendous dearth of great hardcore bands out there. There are a few more bands that could be classified as "good" and then a seemingly infinite number of shitty ones. Celebrity Murders is a great band and Time to Kill Space is without a doubt, one of the best hardcore albums to come around in a long, long time. This could quite possibly be the only band strong enough to mount a resurrection of the NYC hardcore scene that's lain dormant these many years.

The band keeps it real with an analog recording of seventeen tracks guaranteed to kick your prick back to 1983 while still managing to sound more vicious and relevant than 96% of their contemporaries. It's always good when a group has a sound that conjures images of where they hail from. Think of any part of New York City's seedy underbelly and you've got the score right here. This is what The Warriors would be listening to on the way back to Coney. Strolling through Clinton or DUMBO (pre-modifications), this is the album that should be running through your head.

This is a group that makes me excited for music again. It's like a Vitamin B Shot in my fat, jaded ass and leading the revolution, cutting a wide swath through the concrete jungle of mediocrity is Artie Philie, whose vocals are just fucking vicious and couldn't be more suited to the task. Do yourself a huge favor, kids. Buy this album. Seriously. And If I'm wrong about anything I've just said, you know where to reach me.

Celebrity Murders – Time to Kill Space cover artwork
Celebrity Murders – Time to Kill Space — Chainsaw Safety, 2006

Recently-posted album reviews

The Crosses

Outlier
Rushmor Records, Spectragram Records, Triple Eye Industries (2026)

There’s always a risk when a band forms out of legacy. Especially one tied to something as influential as Die Kreuzen. Lean too hard on the past and it becomes nostalgia. Push too far away and you lose the thread entirely. On Outlier, The Crosses manage to thread that needle, delivering a debut EP that feels less like a revival … Read more

Sealer

Sealer
The Ghost Is Clear Records (2026)

Some bands aim for controlled chaos. Sealer sound like they’re actively trying to lose control and then figuring out how to weaponize that moment right before everything collapses. Their self-titled debut lands somewhere between hardcore, noise rock, and something far less stable, pulling from each without settling into any one comfortably. From the opening seconds of “Seeing/Peeling,” Sealer makes their … Read more

Palette Knife

Keyframe
Take This To Heart Records (2026)

There’s a fine line between being a quirky emo band with scene references and something that actually sticks. On Keyframe, Columbus trio Palette Knife don’t just flirt with that line but sharpen it, name it after a Final Fantasy item, and build ten huge choruses around it. The band’s self-described “Nerd-Core-Mid-West-Emo” tag could easily read like a gimmick, but this … Read more